what do you wish for?

Greetings!

Hiya hi! I'm Xrys (said like Chris), but some friends call me Wish/Kaz/Impii/Faylie. You can use any pronouns for me, I really don't mind. Welcome to my web site!!

I really miss how the internet was when I was younger, and this is my attempt to get back to some of those better days, haha. I also HATE social media so it's good to flee that and still get to be a part of the world wide web and share what I'm up to!

Ultimately this site's just a space for me to be me and document my life as it goes, so while you're here, here's some info on all that!

Also, I'm writng this page on 08/12, which is my birthday!!
I think it's a fun way to start things :)

Want to reach me with a question, reccommendation, or anything else? I'm all ears!

Shoot me an email @ xryswish@proton.me ! I'll try to get back to you soon!

lets get the facts straight on xrys

Basic Facts

The Deets

AGE

✧ 26 ✧
1999 baby!

SIGNS

leo ☉
virgo ☽
scorpio ↑

BACKGROUND

i'm mixed and live in the usa!!
✧ half palestinian + half irish ✧

GENDER

i'm agender!
i really don't mind what people think of as my gender, I feel pretty without gender myself

SEXUALITY

i am bisexual !!
AND i'm married! BOOYAH
i got married in 2020 and its been 5 epic years so far, my partner rules

PETS

i have a cat at home named Celeste!! thats my daughter
she's a flame point siamese cat
and she's 4 years old! my partner and I say she's our practice baby, hah

The FEATS

EDUCATION

i really used to adore school, but i had to delay college for personal reasons

i'm planning to go back in 2026/2027 to study writing
and achieve my BA (and hopefully someday MFA) in Creative Writing!

ODD JOBS

fun jobs i've worked moving around and all:

barista, rollerskating carhop, vintage sweets salesman, budtender, baker, library page

i loved being a carhop and candy seller best, i love entertaining families

TRAVEL

i hope to see even more of the world, but so far i've visited:

Canada
Mexico
The Dominican Republic
Belize
The Cayman Islands
Syria
Jordan
Lebanon
Palestine
(Jersusalem, Bethlehem, Nablus)

FUN FACTS

ITEMS COLLECTED

guitar picks
enamel pins
vinyl records
ticket stubs
micro lockers
tamagotchi
star jewelry

INSTRUMENTS OWNED

Ibanez MikroBass
Fender Stratocaster
First Act 222 Acoustic
Luna Ukulele
Stylophone

FUZZY FRIENDS

currently adore

celeste (my cat) cosette (childhood cat, lives with mom!) cid (sister's cat)

forever loved

koda (childhood husky)
stitch (syrian hamster)
alphonse (roborovski dwarf)
edward (roborovski dwarf)
oceanus (betta)
jareth (betta)
parlsey (robin rescue)
thumper (rabbit rescue)

FAVORITES FACTS

SENSATION

TASTE ?

Umami!
though i like salty and sour too
i love the idea of sweets but get tired of sugar fast

SCENT ?

lilac, magnolia, white musk
oud, linen, grillin' meats

COLOR ?

black/white together
(if its an option)
otherwise purple! or teal!

TEXTILE ?

jersey!
or mesh. i like to dress light

RESONANCE ?

bizarre love triangle
by New Order greatest song of all time

CELEBRATION

SEASON ?

autumn!
I really have a love/hate with summer, haha

WEATHER ?

I love rain and cloudy days, they feel so cozy

HOLIDAY ?

HALLOWEEN!!
plus birthdays, if those count

SPORT ?

i like baseball!
go rays and cubbies

CAKE FLAVOR ?

it's tough, top three are:
tiramisu
birthday cake
red velvet

Genrefication

CHILDHOOD STORY ?

The Little Prince!
i also love The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle

MUSIC ERA ?

I love the 80s, i grew up with a lot of stuff from then
i also have a big sweet spot for the 00s

FILM GENRE ?

I love scary movies! i also have a soft spot for animated films and classics
i don't think there's a genre i don't like though

MEALS ?

lamb makloubeh
potato gnocci soup
crab rangoons

GAME CONSOLE ?

I love the nintendo 64!
i gotta name the gamecube, dreamcast, and ps2 though as HMs

PREFERENCE FACTS

MISC. LIKES

starshapes
phone charms
roller coasters
rhythm games
vocaloid
keychains
liminial spaces
90s/00s nostalgia
cats
checkerboards
sweet iced tea
citrus
rollerskating
graphic novels
animanga
europop
betta fish
silver

MISC. DISLIKES

spiders
most bugs
high humidity
cold weather
wool
chili powder
(i like real peppers tho)
general evils of the world
long loading times

Strange Facts

BODY

LEND A HAND?

im left handed /southpaw! i was taught to occassionally use my right for stuff

i prefer playing right handed style for instruments

ODD MARKINGS

i have a LOT of freckles! i used to hate them as a kid but now i think theyre cute

i have a birthmark that looks like a lobotomy scar LOL

i currently have 3 tattoos! i'd like to get a lot more!! i love stickerstyle / ignorant tattoos

i think its fun to look like i have doodles and stickers! i love tattoo as an art form, and despite the pain, its so worth it guys

i love dying my hair! ive done nearly every color, my favorite was obviously black and white split though

overdue for another color... maybe a poll is in order.

MIND

DOCTOR'S ORDERS

i have PTSD and ADHD, diagnosed in 2017/2019 i don't shy from my mental health journey and chatting about this funny brain i got. I'll explore some of my experiences and such in blogs here though, I think that's fun!

I am also on my third year of ED recovery, and working hard to stay as happy and healthy as I can be! You'll see more about my journey here too (more of a cheat for my own progress, but hey, gotta be proud of how far I've come!)

"HIGH"LY MEDICATED

I'm a medical marijuana user and advocate! I was in a car accident at age 19 that left me with moderate-to-servere chronic pain from a spinal injury :\

medical cannabis saved my poor liver the fate of a hundred painkillers a week and helps me manage my pain and PTSD symptoms!

I'm very fortunate to be somewhere where this care is easily accessible, and I hope to keep contributing to activism that helps more people get access to what helps their pain, and to help efforts to decriminalize marijuana usage in the usa. No one should be in jail for weed!

SOUL

I like to believe in a core goodness in people and the world as a whole. I've had some adverse experiences in life, but I geuninely think that kindness is always an option, and that we should look out for each other always, any way we can.

We can always leave things better than we we were given it.

HEAR MY HEART

Join me in some places I've been trying to regularly support, especially in these times of crisis for these communities!

Donate to help a family like my own find hope in Gaza

Support the National Network of Abortion Funds

Protect the dolls, support the Advocates for Trans Equality

Uplift sexual abuse survivors with RAINN

INTERESTS AND HOBBIES AND PASTTIMES

Writing Words of All Kinds

What Do I Write?

I write some fanwork fiction and original creative and article works! Sometimes the occassional poem, though not so much anymore

I'm hoping to start writing more analytical work and essays to explore works of art I love and to share the thoughts I have on them on here and on Youtube in video essay form sometime soon.

I also have a novel I hope to publish some day, as well as a few games/shorter narratives, and a digital horror mixed media project on the table too.

I also write semi-professionally for some local businesses in my area, mainly educational manuals and informative/promotional brand content for their sites, but I find professional writing really fun too!

early days

I was first introduced to writing for fun by my older sisters, who were super into writing explorative works of LoTR, Sailor Moon, Cowboy Bebop, and Doctor Who when I was a preteen, and that ended up being a really big influence in wanting to make my own extensions of the stories I loved.

I've been doing it on and off since I was 9 and used to post on FF.Net, then later Ao3 for a short while, but mainly wrote in private circles for friends and the occassional commission. I really enjoy fanwriting as creative excersizes. Sometimes I just can't get enough of a work and the places and people within it! Getting lost in my own stuff is an entire, even longer story, haha...

I'll be hosting my own writing here on the site, feel free to give them a read some time! I might post some of my old fics here too, there's no shame in the early days, right? ^^;;

CURRENT PROJECTS

fanwork

Cease Your Distractions

The Outlast Trials
(original content narrative extension)

Non Ho Voce, e Tuttavia… [Parlo]

Lies of P
(Hotel Krat cast character study)

Floodlights and Painted Skies

Poppy Playtime
(original content narrative extension)

original works

Carwyr

my novel!
more coming soon!

Everlast / l1la.4ev3r

my web project!
more coming soon!

ARE YOU SEEING THIS, CHAT?

(NOT) LIVE ON TWITCH DOT TV (RN)

I started twitch streaming in 2022-2023 over on my channel, impiiish, and it was such a blast! I never expected streaming and vTubing to be so much fun. I've had the pleasure of working with these really neat artists on bringing my vTuber persona, Impii, to life!

I have had such a fun time learning OBS studio, veadotube, and other softwares, as well as building my own virtual sets for karaoke streams or themed events!

A huge thanks for that goes to mae (3005jin) , who took my scribbles and made them into a mini me by making my PNGTuber and final design!

content for content

horror games (old/new/indie)
rhythm games
roguelikes/dungeon crawlers
puzzles and mystery games
RPGs and turn-based adventure
cozy indie titles

from hitting LIVE to hitting REC

While I've been on hiatus for a while for streaming (regretfully got overwhelmed with life stuff), but I have been thinking about making web content again, especially content on games.
I'm thinking of revamping what I do on twitch to be more oriented towards YouTube and making long form videos about topics that I find interesting, like spaces on the earlier internet, literary themes in horror games, digital web projects and ARGs, and more!

PLAYING FOR PCRF

I have had the honor to get to use my channel for good and I stream in support of the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund!

The PCRF is a critical and life-saving foundation that helps get food and medical treatment to children in Gaza who are facing acute malnutrition. I'm really honored that my little community was able to make a a little difference.

A big goal of mine is to return to streaming and continue doing so for charity! It means the world to be able to do something good with my silly gaming online

MIXING MEDIUMS, STUDYING SKILLS...

WHAT'S COOKIN'

I really like experimenting and doing new crafts and digital projects. I've dabbled in Unity, Blender, FLStudio, and do a lot of edits on Canva and make moodboards for fun, among other things. I also like to make project bibles for my works on Notion.

corkboard collections

I collect a lot of odds and ends, love making playlists, writing poetry, and I really enjoy puzzles and gaming, especially indie stuff or emulating some of my childhood favorites!
i used to do a lot of physical crafting (crochet, papercraft, cooking, polymer clay), and I'd like to get back to it sometime
I also love to run (weights are my enemy 4ever but I love cardio), read, and listen to video essays.

cause for pause

I care deeply about activism for human rights and progressive movements and try to stay up to date and keep people informed too! I hope I can make some cool educational and resourceful zones on this site ahead to help good causes :)

BUILDING COMMUNITY

I also run an adult digital horror/ARG/general cool web community called the VMDD (Virtual Media Discussion Discord)!

We started out as a group to dissect the series, Vermis Malum (which is so good i'm begging you to watch it), and it's only florished from there! We have a small but really dedicated and bright community, I'm so proud of the great members we have and the cool conversations and creations they bring.

if you're of age (you should be to be on my site) and interested in digihorror projects and kindhearted folks, come join the V.M.D.D.! We'd love to have you!

We're hosting media jams over there too, I cant wait to share what I make for it over here!

WITH THE HEART OF A TRUE GAMER

LIFELONG MULTIPLAYER

I LOVE VIDEO GAMES!!!

No but really, I love any and all kinds of games!

great genres

psychological horror
survival horror
multiplayer horror
puzzle
RPG
party games
social deduction
card battler
rhythm games
rougelike
bullet hell

worn out discs (favorites)

silent hill 3
sayonara wild hearts
deltarune
undertale
legend of zelda: twilight princess
vampire survivors
snowboard kids 2
pokemon stadium
kid icarus: uprising
content warning
PEAK
space channel 5
shadow of the colossus
nier: automata

series origins

I've been playing video games of all genres for as long as I can remember, and I really am grateful for that.

My parents were arcade enthusiasts when they met and passed that love of games down to my siblings and I. I recall playing games with my sisters as young as 5 years old!

(for my 5th birthday I got to name a shiny chao on SA2! it doesn't get better than that)

I remember beating LoZ: Ocarina of Time back in grade school and having my mind blown it! And years later playing Fatal Frame for my first horror game and spending spooked all-nighters waiting for those ghosts to show up in my room. Years and years of adventures, stories, frights, and fights on the couch in front of the TV with old rentals turned to time online with friends on the PC.

I wouldn't trade it for anything. I owe a lot of inspiration and treasured memories to the games I've played, and I really respect the art of making them! Jeez, that's hard ><

console collection

nintendo 64
nintendo gamecube
nintendo wii
nintendo switch
nintendo gameboy advance SP
nintendo DS lite
nintendo 3ds

sega dreamcast
playstation 1
playstation 2
playstation 3
playstation 4
anbernic rg406v
PC

GAMER TO GAMEMAKER

I love playing games, and i really wanted to learn how to make them! I've been dabbling in Unity and recently acquired game maker, which I hope to learn a little more with and put projects out on my itch.io!

current and past craft

SparrowCarols

Unity game + Writing gift + mixtape
for my friend Sasha!

"Collect treasures as you traverse the land and sky to inspire your song."

Floodlights and Painted Skies

Unity point-and-click puzzle + visual novel
Half a fan project, half a graphic design/brand study personal project! It was really fun to play in the visual style MOB uses and to imagine and create assets/plotlines that can fit seamlessly into an established story/visual style

"You'll always be a part of Playtime."

THE SWEET SOUND OF MUSIC

What Do I Listen to?

I like all kinds of music from literally everywhere! Genre and language ususally isn't a barrier to me, same with any era. I love everything from classical to hyperpop!

I grew up listening to music from all over and from all genres, but my family had some interesting favorites (notably 2010s kpop and 80s/2000s eygptian pop) that i also know way too much about lol

record spin

classical
synth pop
new wave
shoegaze
post rock
post hardcore
edm
eurobeat
rap
pop punk
alternative

mix making

I love making playlists and mixes, I've been doing it since as long as I can remember.

I have some personal burned CD mixes that I used to make home box covers and art for, and that's an old habit I'm trying to get back to!

I'd love to upload them here for folks to check em out if they're interested. I used to be a big fan of 8tracks and more abstract/narrative playlist making instead of the dumps of albums you see on Spotify nowadays, especially dedicated towards character studies or themed around a mood or experience.

You can check out some of my fanmixes or mixes around my projects here on my spotify, but I'm hoping to leave that platform soon. I'm trying to step away from streaming platforms as a whole and get back to sailing the seas and hosting my own media.

I try to share what I have, so if you're interested, just let me know >v>

What do I play?

I grew up playing an electronic keyboard by ear with my siblings, and I used to play french horn/trumpet in orchestra in school!
i really liked horns but they're expensive to own, lol

other than that I used to scour my local area for instruments and try to pick them up! I had a few oddballs, like an accordion, toy piano, and viola, but I've learned to properly play keyboard, ukulele, guitar, and bass!

I mostly play stuff by ear/with tabsheets, but I want to get better at reading sheet music and doing proper arrangements, as well as more music electronically. I didn't have access to my instruments for a few years but I just got them back, and I plan to upload recorded snippets of covers and little tracks!

THANKS FOR FLYIN' BY!

BYE FOR NOW!

WOW you read it all! :) Thanks for taking the time to get to know me!! I'm flattered, really :3

no but really, have fun on the site! I plan to have a lot of pages collecting my favorite things to share and some things of my own.

i hope you like them, and i hope you'll stop by again sometime! Bye bye!